Oh, what a day!!

This is sad. Really sad. First, Remember my dental trauma yesterday? My mouth looks like this:

When it's supposed to look like this:

I wish I had a sweetie, and then it would look like this:

I can be SO sexy when I try!

And then today is the day I decided to clean my closet. I wanted to get out of bed at about midnight last night and just start throwing things out of it, but I was afraid Judy would get all freaked out about it and call the cops or something. So I decided to wait until today.

I forgot to take a "before" photo; this is after I emptied the first half.

However, I didn't plan ahead, and when I needed to get a clean top out of the pile to wear to Busbyberkly's birthday cake party, everything slid to the floor and then I heard plastic hangers crunching and I got my foot caught under the bed when I tried to reach something, and I thought I wouldn't be able to get my foot out, and so I had to pull and pull and twist and writhe in pain, and then I was so tired I couldn't even get up!! Really!! I called for Judy and she helped me. It is just too bad I didn't have my selfie stick or my phone down there! My foot and ankle will probably be very bruised. I'm just glad I didn't have to cut my foot off like that guy who had to cut off his arm when he got stuck in a canyon. But then maybe they would make a movie of it. Oh, well. I'll probably get some body part stuck somewhere again. I'll try to plan better.

In between, I had a major anxiety attack, and I ran around the apartment making weird noises and throwing the Tuesday junk mail all over. Judy said if it made me feel better, it was OK for me to do that. It did make me feel better. And I eventually picked it all up, and fortunately she didn't step on it and slip and fall down. That would not have been good!

But then I was all worn out!!! I really did feel better, though.

 Oh, my gosh, I am so exhausted tonight!!

Imaginary Friends

Somebody posted this on FB today and I HAD to steal it! Actually, I really did have an imaginary friend when I was young. His name was Tibby. I apparently left him upstairs in the big Los Angeles Macy's store once, and we had to go back up on the elevator several floors ( a big deal in the Forties) to get him, At home I always insisted that he have a place set for him at dinner, and according to all reports, we had a very interesting life together. And of course, I still believe in Santa Claus.

By the way, if you haven't seen Jimmy Stewart in the old classic movie "Harvey," you need to. It's wonderful!!

Does makeup really help, or is it just my imagination?

I have enjoyed wearing makeup since I was old enough to start (maybe 14? We weren't as precocious in those days.) I'm not as glam as daughter LeeAnn or niece Carole, but my "natural beauty" has needed some "enhancement," and that's even more true since I "matured," (Euphemism for "got old.") There used to be a saying about old barn and new paint, but I don't remember how it went. That's pretty much my answer for everything these days: "I don't remember."

(Before)
No makeup

(After)
With makeup

There are old women who wear no makeup who look really old and don't care. There are old women who wear too much makeup and think they look gorgeous. There are old women who wear no makeup who have natural beauty and are beautiful, but obviously old, women. There are old women who wear just the right carefully chosen and applied makeup who don't look too young, but don't look too old, and like Goldilocks, find it "just right." 

There are young women who wear no makeup and look old. There are young women who wear too much makeup and look old (and hard.) There are young women who wear no makeup and look beautiful. There are young women who carefully choose and apply makeup, and the Goldilocks rule kicks in again.

I have to mention the (usually) over-40 women who still do their makeup the way they learned in high school. Yes, I see darkly lined lips with lighter lipstick; bright pink gloss; heavy blue eye shadow; eyebrows penciled out to the hair line; fuzzy female mullets (I think there's a name for them?) Fortunately, these are not usually all the same person. And my dear aunt, who, in her senile years, confused her red lip liner with her eyebrow pencil and had bright red brows, telling us she had no idea how they got that way!

And I now totally understand the little old ladies with the bright pink cheeks, bright red over-drawn lips, and heavy white powdered forehead. Because:

1. They can't see they have any color anywhere unless it's really heavy. 
2. They can't see they have any color anywhere unless the light is spotlight bright.
3. They can't ask their husband how they look because he isn't there any more. (And even if he were, he wouldn't be able to see any better than she can. That is, if he even hears her ask the question. And he probably wouldn't know the difference anyway, if he's a typical male.) 

OK. I WILL BE MAKING SEXIST, AGEIST, NON-PC comments and observations, and if you are offended, refer to my earlier post. I'm old. I grew up in a different time, I have managed to be politically correct most of the time up until now. I am not a mean person. Get over it.

Saturday is a special day. It's the day we get ready for Sunday! We shampoo our hair, and we brush our teeth, and we scrub our face, and we iron our shoes, and we mop the car, and we . . . . . .

 

Ooooooooo,  9 a. m. Church. . . . . .!!! Why am I smiling????

Silly Swag

Some people really like silly swag. Some others are totally disgusted with an over-70-year-old goofy gramma that's into SILLY. So if you like SILLY SWAG, here's the link. If you want SERIOUS SWAG, you'll have to go to a different place! Or maybe you aren't interested in this blog site at all. That's OK. I won't be offended, and I hope you won't be, either.








 They didn't choose me for any important parts at the Shakespeare Festival in Cedar City this year, so I had to create my own role. You can use the comments section to tell me what you think it was.